Monday, October 1, 2007

Cheers and Boo-Urns: Week 4

CHEERS to Jon Kitna, who led the Lions back for the third time this season! This blog's name still has relevancy! HOORAH!

BOO-Urns to my weekend picks. After starting the day hot (6-1 in the early games), I took an epic dump in the 4 o'clock and Sunday Night games. Record for the week: 7-6. Let's just hope Cincy mans up, rises above their crummy Ohio origins and commits various crimes against the New England secondary. A shivving would be welcome.

CHEERS to Diego Montoya Anderson and Eli Manning for being relevant for another week. Especially to Diego, who totally pimp-slapped the Ravens. Too bad Jamal Lewis couldn't do the same. I may be a Ravens fan, but damn, do I love the irony of Diego downing the Ravens. I guess I'm just a fan of Irony in general.

BOO-Urns to the Houston Texans. Those first two weeks of the season really got my hopes up. Jerks. I hope Matt Schaub finds a bug in his Wheaties this morning. (Side note: I wonder if athletes still eat Wheaties for breakfast)

CHEERS to Coach Norv Turner for murdering the hopes of another franchise. Honorable mention to Phillip Rivers who appears to have gone color blind, or perhaps has been replaced by Jordan Palmer. If Phillip Rivers offers you a balloon this week and asks you if you've been saved, well, that's just not Phillip Rivers.

BOO-Urns to Brian Griese. Note to Lovie: BRING BACK REX!

CHEERS to Tampa Bay for thriving in the face of Cadillac Williams' knee a-sploding early in the game. Jesus, you could hear his knee pop all the way in Barrow, Alaska, from what I've read. It registered a 6.4 seismic reading in Carolina.

A BIG BOO-Urns to Carolina for not covering. You destroyed Chris Simms' spleen, and you couldn't win that game. Cadillac's knee is now in geo-synchronous orbit over Uruguay, and you couldn't win yesterday either. You're a blood thirsty bunch of thugs, but you can't win. Just. Plain. Sad.

CHEERS to Brett Favre for totally ignoring Dan Marino's recorded message o' congratulations after Favre shredded Marino's TD record. There are too many good sports in the NFL when it comes to record-breaking. Cheers to Brett for being an obnoxious jerk about it.

DOUBLE CHEERS to Daunte Culpepper for rubbing the health of his knee in the face of Miami's fans. That was world-class taunting. I'm struggling to find a way to reference the Minnesota Love Boat in here, but since I can't, maybe it's time to put it to rest.


MC said...

How about a Boo-urns for the 2006 Steelers showing up to play?

Side note - I picked Cleveland and Buffalo winning this weekend. I think I'm kind of a big deal for that.

Happy Fun Miles said...

I think you're always kind of a big deal, mostly because you say as such.

I picked Cleveland, too.

You saw the 2006 Steelers yesterday, and I saw the 2005 Ravens. Very, very depressing stuff.